Summer Gone By

This summer has been amazing. I was thinking, last week, of how much I am going to miss seeing all the kid's smiling faces, my team, and even the Lincoln Courts. It seems like it's all passed so fast. It feels like yesterday, that I was calling all the kids the same name, or sitting in training with group of my new found friends of Americorps. My final summer of college has gone by and I wouldn't have wanted to spend it anywhere else. This internship has been a blessing that apart from God, would have never happened. Even as I write this Gloria, one of my 7 year olds, is sitting in fornt of me trying to cover my eyes while I type, laughing hysterically. You just don't get this kind of experience anywhere else. I know this all sounds disorganized but I just can't find the words to communicate my gratitude for such a fulfilling summer. God bless!

We were assigned a fellow worker to write about in this week's blog and here is the one that I wrote. Hope you enjoy!

~~YO CANDICE! She's a real cool cat. She's got a lot of this, and a lot of that. We all think that she's real neat. So come check out my sweet new beat. She's always fly, even on the jet plane. Always on time, never in the traffic lane. She cracks the whip, when Jorge's bad, and holds him like a baby when he's sad. She sweeps, mops, and hands out food,and she'll "slap ya in the mouth" if you're rude. She'll blow up your vocab, when you blab, don't try and spell, its just a drab. She's got the power. You know the, soOOULL POWER! Don't mess with her Satan, she'll pray you out, and leave us on the floor, all fallin' out. She talks like a boss, walks like a boss, better count the cost, before you get all cross. All in all, she's ridiculously awesome, stay around her too long, and you can't help but blossom. The End.

So that's my rap for my good friend Candice and pretty much the expanse of my creativity. Candice is one of those people that I love having next me in such challenging arenas like children's programs. She is trustworthy, hardworking, and focused on the task at hand. She is direct and honest about things she likes and dislikes, which is a rare, but needed trait in leaders. She has a consistent, genuine, care and love for the children. Being around her continually makes me a better man, and that is the type of godly woman, like all the urban women, that I enjoy working with. Candice, may God bless you and keep you!~~

The Blessing of Serving Hearts

Do you believe that those we bless are often times the ones we least expect to? A lot of times we don't even know when or where it happens. Previously, I was feeling drained and certainly more pessimistic than normal. A lot of this was due to poor resting habits, stress, and an unspoken tension among the team. However, God gave me an opportunity to see some of my own flaws and bad tendencies that I have been allowing to slip into my character over the past couple of weeks and a new spark to finish strong this summer.

Much of these realizations were from having some new Christ-centered laborers, visiting all the way from Kentucky, along side of our Americorps team. Seeing their heart for the children and an amazing spirit of inclusion put the much needed spark back into my summer. It was their enthusiasm, not their criticism, that spurred me to pick myself up and continue laboring for kingdom victories. They were not afraid to come along side of you and get their hands dirty and always invited you to join in on their home cooked meals, which were amazing. After the kids left one day, we had an outdoor gallon challenge that, after walking inside and coming back to milk that had been heated up on the asphalt, gave me a new perspective on Revelation 3:16 - So, because you are lukewarm--neither hot nor cold--I am about to spit you out of my mouth. I know that the Kentucky team's focus wasn't on me but it's amazing what an enthusiastic heart to serve can do to bless those around it. I know that I am a man of many flaws but I hope that someday I also will be characterized by a passionate serving heart that spurs on other Christ-centered laborers. Shine on!

Hurt Left Unhealed

Heart break was the theme for what I was experiencing last week at urban. On Tuesday, I found out that one of the sweetest girls in my group of 6&7 year olds tried to jump out of a moving car and also attempted to "seriously" attacked her sister. She was then enrolled in the psychiatric ward at a nearby hospital and studied for a while. I was broken over the news. She is one of those kids that melts your heart and rarely gives you any problems. I later found out that she was on medication during the day to keep her calm and due to some "home" problems, she was experiencing a lot of anger.
This same week, I sat outside with a 13 year old girl talking about how angry and short tempered she was at another girl and that it all stemmed from her dad being murdered a few years before. For 45 minutes, with her face streaming in tears of frustration, we talked about having self-control, the consequences of anger, and the healing power of God. I knew that God was the only one that could take her pain away and draw her off of the bad path she is headed down, but she spoke of God as being the one who allowed her father to die. All I could say was that an angry man with a gun killed her dad, not God, and that I truly believe that there is a better and bigger plan for her than the things she is doing currently. My heart was heavy with sorrow for each of the girls, but these are just two stories of the many here at the Lincoln Heights Courts. There is so much pain lurking behind the cute faces here at urban and it is a shame that they all have to be young children. Why does the world overlook things that are going on here, good and bad? Why don't ALL the people of God turn their deafened ears towards the cries of these children and to all the pain left unhealed. I know that I was oblivious to it all once, but if you have ears to hear, let them hear. We can no longer hide behind the "that's not my calling" smokescreen, or "I don't have time" excuse. Jesus speaks of them in them in such a direct way that you would have to be a pharisee to hide from it.
1 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" 2He called a little child and had him stand among them. 3And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5"And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. 6But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. 7 "Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to sin! Such things must come, but woe to the man through whom they come! 8 If your hand or your foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire. 9 And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell. 10"See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven. 12 "What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? 13And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. 14In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.
So Jesus is passionately seeking after all the little ones in San Antonio, but the question is, "Are we?" Are we seeking to be God's guiding and healing hands and feet or are we just being kept in the pockets of our own selfishness like too much change that clangs around in some annoying repetitive fashion.

For Lack of a Better Male

Last week was quite the shift in routine. We began bringing in groups instead of running the daily programs ourselves. This gave me the opportunity to talk to some of the kids a little bit more than I was the week prior. One of the things that I found out was that a very large majority, like all the kids I talked to except one, do not have a father figure in their home and also do not have the opportunity to see him outside of the home. I believe this father figure issue is whats contributing to a lot of behavior problems we experience at Urban, as well as some pre-cursor behaviors to unhealthy lifestyles. I am realizing that it is important that I role model character and integrity for the children, especially the boys, and address situations when there might be a lack of either. The kids will most likely not have them modeled on MTV. I wish I could say more about this subject but I am still getting a grasp on the effects that a father has on his children, good or bad, and how I can substitute some of the essential vitamins of guidance that the children here at Urban are lacking. God Bless.

The Swing Set

The shade of a few oak trees is a beautiful thing when you’ve been outside in the Texas heat trying to keep up with all the curious actions and minds of children. I caught myself in this glorious oasis today with my heart melting from something different than the 100+ degree weather. It was in this shade that I found myself pushing 4 children on the swings from our youngest age group at Urban Connection. Their soft, sweet voices, one after another, kept saying, “Higher Mr. James, higher,” as they would begin to slow down having not yet learned how to tuck their feet and kick them forward to keep themselves going. Their giggles and laughs could only make me smile as I breathed like a horse trying to match their insistent pleas of my master pushing skills. As I repeated this new laborious activity, a lofty thought passed through my mind, “This might be some of the only positive attention these children will get today. So many of the children in this city don’t have a male figure to even push one of them on the swings. And here I am, a 21-year-old college student, getting the opportunity to have just a little moment in their lives, even if it is just pushing them on the swings. Wow!” My eyes, admittedly, were a little watery as time wrapped up and they hopped off the swings and raced to grab my hand to be lead off the playground and to their next to activity. My heart was full of joy and a humbled gratefulness as their little arms were almost fully extended just to reach my hand. You see, I too was the child that wanted to be pushed on the swing set but this was the oh-so-common swing set of life. I once was sitting on a cold swing with no direction or force to change my static life, feeling all alone on a cruel playground with countless bullies to tell me of my worthlessness. This is when Jesus came up and with the slightest, softest pushes began giving me an excitement and direction to a once purposeless life. He Himself took the burden of the weight that the chains held and gave motion to my once motionless life, while at the same time reassuring me of my new found worth in Him. Where would I be without Him? I too, at times, find myself saying, “Higher Jesus, higher” when I might try to take credit for my newly transformed kinetic energy that is slowly dissipating from my inability to be the force that sustains it. He always faithfully responds though with the familiar soft pushes and smiles the warmest of smiles, as he knows that someday I will leave this playground too, holding His hand and ranting on and on about how great He is and how I can’t wait for what’s next. Thank you Jesus!

“…I have come that the may have life, and have it more abundantly.” – John 10:10

First Week at Urban

It has been an amazing first week serving at Urban Connection - San Antonio. I am having a blast and I am so grateful for the chance to be a part of whats happening here. We kicked-off last Thursday with Americorps training in Dallas where the whole team (8 girls and 2 guys) stayed at a hotel together. The hotel graciously upgraded Josh and I to a suite on the club members floor with free breakfast and appetizers at no cost. What a blessing! I didn't expect much from the training but it was very informative and stoked a fire in me to set my face towards neighborhoods often overlooked, in order that a few might be saved. One of the crazy things that I found out was that Texas has the highest child hunger problem with at least 2.2 million children going hungry every year. These are children that can't perform well in school because they're hungry and given no positive attention at home. Even more amazing is that this is happening on the Church's watch. How can you say you love Jesus but knowingly allow little children go without food in their stomach. The book of James in the Bible lands so much harder for me now. While at the training, I had the opportunity to lead one of four groups, composed of other Americorps members stationed at other non-profits in Dallas, in a trash pick up. The location we were at was one of the worst places in Dallas. I haven't seen so much drug paraphernalia in my life! We picked up crack bags, blown out cocaine balloons, and alcohol bottles of all kinds. I had to run between streets and through alley ways to manage four different sub-groups that had been split up through the neighborhood but God's peace was with me. It was a great opportunity to serve others and get my hands dirty! I couldn't have been happier with the chance to lead. On Monday, we were back at Urban in San Antonio and started our specific organizational training and planning. Josh, Julia, and I will be in charge of outdoor activities all next week. Each day, the activities will have something to do with a popular kids movie, such as Kung Fu Panda, Happy Feet, Planet 51, The Incredibles, and Madagascar. We have planned games like Asteroid toss, a penguin slip and slide, and super hero relays. Josh and I will also be doing a sports oriented, urban after hours (UAH pronounced oooahhh by Ms. Randi) program for only boys. We didn't want to exclude the girls but we figured that it might be some of the only intentional time we have with just the boys. Oh man! I almost forgot! Yesterday, we went to the San Antonio Food Bank to load up food into a big U-Haul truck for the Urban Resource Center. When we were unloading it at Urban, we found a live rat chilling in one of the boxes. I heroically went after him with just a broom to which he responded by jumping out of the truck and passing right between Josh's legs. The kids, the Spanish speaking women, and I were all chasing him down the street yelling "MATALE!", which means "kill him". It must have been a funny site. Luckily for him though, once he was trapped between one of the boys feet, one of the ladies picked him up by his tale and tossed him in the dumpster. I'm sure he was in heaven. Other than that we have been playing some super competitive games of kickball and dodge ball, and training for the many perceived situations that await us. I am confident the team can handle it though. We are each very different but every one of them is an amazing person! I really like the individuals I am serving along side and I couldn't say enough about them. Some thoughts that I will leave you with were given to us today by Pastor Craig, Director of Kingdom Relations, and are continuing to motivate me to give my all in the upcoming summer. The first one went something like this,"These kids that we are working with only know a life of survival, which is different from living. We are getting the opportunity to teach them how to LIVE!" and the next,"We love these children the same way God loves us, unconditionally. That means that our love has nothing to do with whether they are loveable or not. We love them either way." Thanks for reading!